After a long travel I arrived at Pettenasco train station. My phone was not working and so I was lucky that a french guy who attended the radical honesty retreat was also there an called the facilitators, so that we got picked up.
At the “house Felicina” were already a bunch of people waiting. Because I felt tired after the long journey, I took a shower and a rest first.
The start of the workshop
Around 5pm on April 22nd 2023 the radical honesty 8 day intensive started. Marvin and J. were assisted by Gabriela. To begin smoothly we started with 2 name rounds.
The first partner exercise I did with a tall guy with curly hairs. It was about sharing the expectations for this workshop. The only thing I remember is, that it turned out in a big yawning session.
The first day we didn´t have a evening program. On the following evenings we shared our live stories. Only I did mine in the morning because I picked the last evening of the workshop and I wanted people to know my life beforehand.
The structure of the most days looked mainly like this:
In the morning we did movement exercises, pleasure yoga and meditations followed by the breakfast. After that we started with a sharing circle and debriefed the life stories from the evening before.
To round up the morning we did a little bit of exercises, mostly in pairs.
Then we went up to the Centro d´Ompio for lunch and watched male peacocks to display themselves infront of the females and show us their beautiful feathering.
After lunch we had some time for ourselves. We were free to decide how we want to spend it. Eighter alone or with someone else or just sleeping.
Nearby was the beautiful lake Orta and also two waterfalls. I visited all 3 during our stay. The combination of a workshop and a nice holiday location was really nice.
The radical honesty workshop restarted at 4:30 pm. The start was different from day to day. Some days we danced to a song and one person did some dance move and all other people followed. The person demonstrating the move changed after around 15-30 seconds. This “game” was in one way really cool. But on the other hand I felt hesitancy because some part of my mind said that the dance move that I demonstrate must be somehow cool and good.
Theory took turn with partner exercises or sharings after that. The theory was beautifully put into graphics by Gabriela.
Some of the exercises and theory I really liked, some I did not. Really good was the awareness continuum. 
Especially I liked the drawing with the flashlight (see above in the center) that made it very clear. Also I liked the triade in the morning. Three people came together and shared about everything what is in their mind and body right now or which important things came up. The verbal taboos (above on the right) made me aware much more of the wording that I use. Especially the word “but” I used far too often.
What I did not like were the sharing about money. Especially the term “what is your net worth” is crazy in my eyes. How can some diry paper with numbers on it ever describe your worth? The exercise was to share what you earn, the amount of savings and investments etc. and also the worth of physical things, like cars, houses etc. Some people also expect an inheritance. And all togehter is “your net worth”.
I can not say it it is true, but I sensed some bullshit in this exercise. People said: money is not important for them but on the same time the desire money for security.
Other exercises were quite interesting as well, like the “Sometimes I pretend…., while in reality I am….”. Or the “I notice” (something visible with the eyes) and “I imagine” (something brought up by your mind) exercise. Also we did the “should” and “no” exercise where one partner always came up with somehing he or she should do and the other one always responded with “NO”. We made this also with external people, like he or she should (parents, partner, friends).
For dinner we went again up to the Centro, we were able to catch the last sunlight on the terrace while we ate.
Life Storys
The life story part of the radical honesty retreat after dinner was very interesting. It was very emotional and a little bit like cinema to hear from everyone the experiences that he or she made. In the end of the lifestory the storyteller got asked what was the best and what was the worst time in his or her life. My mind was busy while I was listening to the life stories. It always said that I have to show emotions in front when it is my turn. Also my mind was comparing the stories from the others with my own stories.
The days of the radical honesty 8 day intensive were all quite emotional. The concept that it is necessary to express the emotions only verbally and not with actions was new for me. But it made sense somehow. I felt much more emotions when I was not allowed to escape them with actions like in other workshops. To handle the upcoming emotions I took times for me alone. During food or also in the lunchbreak.
Naked work
A very special part of the radical honesty workshop was the naked work. At the 4th day of the workshop after lunch it was naked time. After the explanation how it will work, all participants and also the trainers took their clothes of at the same time. One by one we stood infront of the group and answered questions. Before the participants started, the trainers went infront of everybody and talked about their body and their sexual life. So no participant had to go first what made it more relaxed.
Still it was quite a challenge to stand naked infront of the group. Sitting naked with everybody also naked was not that tough for me. But as soon I was standing there infront of everybody with no clothes that felt unprotected. Clothes are not really an armor. But they prevent others from seeing your body, what most people think of is who they really are, as it really is.
The questions we had to answer were: What do you like about your body and what do you not like? When did you first find out that you are a sexual being? When did you first have sex? How many sexual partners did you have? And then at last if you want to tell something else.
In the evening we did a “No talent – talent show” where everyone had the chance to perform something, even he or she is not very good at it or doesn´t even have talent.
The night after turned out in a no pants allowed dancing party. The underwear was still allowed, it was no orgy.
My own experience of the radical honesty 8 day intensive retreat
For me personally the most special day was the day of my life story. I was triggered by some people in the morning sharing circle and I started crying. Even though it is a genral believe that crying is a sad thing, for me it was more a relief. My mind was always pushing that I have to show emotions to be taken seriously. This was mostly because of something that happened to me before in the sharing circle. Someone cried and the coaches said “take your time” I said something and did not cry. I can not exactly remember what the trainers said. For me it sounded like “hurry up, what is your point”.
It felt really wonderful to just cry. My thinking mind was cut of. I just felt my body. And I felt a lot. There was a tingling very strong in my head and in my hands, but also in the rest of my body. I could not even walk, somebody had to support me on the way to the toilet. I cried for around an hour. The other were continuing with the the debriefing of the life storys from the day before.
And then it was my time for my lifestory. In the morning I was very nervous. I could not sleep the night before. My mind was always busy with thoughts, comparisons and pressure to be good. But in the moment when I started my life story I just didn´t care. I also said the I think I don´t have to show emotions in the life story, I did enough already.
What I personally took most from this radical honesty 8 day intensive workshop is to put clearer boundaries in my life. To first feel and then say if something is ok for me in the moment or not. To be more aware of what I don´t want and automatically I also got more awareness for what I want. My needs and desires.
And what I also liked very much was the quote from one of the trainers: “I suck today and I´m ok with that”.
I will be very happy if you share your opinion on this article or your own experience in the comments!
And of course it is very interesting if you share what touched you, what resonates in you or what is alive in you while you read this lines.